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The Ninja Selling Podcast

Apr 19, 2021

Today Matt and Garrett are excited to discuss the common misconception that people need to use you as an agent – instead, they should want to work with you because of the guidance and expertise you bring, not just the service. They talk about having conversations early on to create relationships and build a foundation that shows your value, asking F.O.R.D. questions (family, occupation, recreation, and dreams) to engage and genuinely connect with people, and how this process sets clients up to actively want you in their corner when real estate needs come up.

Using the examples of milk, cars, dating, and tires, our hosts explain that there really is no need for certain products or services over another. But if you can show people what you bring to the table, they will want to work with you even if they don’t necessarily need you, and refer you to friends and family as well. By bringing joy to the selling process, making it an enjoyable experience, and solving problems for your clients, you can eliminate commission objections and establish yourself as an important resource that people will want to use time and time again. How do you ‘drive the want’ and make sure clients seek you out to be part of their real estate journey?

Matt and Garrett invite you to share your ideas on the Ninja Selling Podcast group on Facebook at, where you can also ask questions and discuss episodes. You can check out for information on events and open installations. And a reminder that you can now leave a voicemail with your direct feedback at 208 MY-NINJA.


Episode Highlights:

  •       People don’t need you – they should want to work with you
  •       Creating conversations with the right people 
  •       Building relationships for long-term success
  •       Selling wants versus needs
  •       Building value through F.O.R.D. questions (family, occupation, recreation, and dreams)
  •       Focusing on people’s wants, rather than needs
  •       Bringing joy to the selling process and making the process easier for clients
  •       How genuine connections can also lead to referrals



I think it's a big misconception a lot of people have is that they think people need them this much.”

“It makes so much sense. We need food and water, right, everything else is a desire. We've qualified different levels of need, I guess, as we advance in society.”

“The average person can Google all the stuff they need to be able to sell their home on their own. They don't need you… But it's different when you show up in their world as such a resource to make it easy for them, to help guide, to bring education, and smarts, and the expertise that you've gained over the years… You bring all this with you to the point that then they're going, ‘Okay, I want Matt Bonelli in my corner when I'm going to go sell my next home.’”

“I look at it as having a professional in your corner... I want to have him supporting me and guiding me as I'm buying new property.”

“That's the level that we need to be focusing on building and growing, and this happens through F.O.R.D. (family, occupation, recreation, and dreams).”

“Even people who do the cold call stuff, and they're really good at it – they aren't driving need, they're selling value in driving the want and the desire to work with somebody.”

“When you ask those questions, when you engage somebody like that, it makes them want to move towards you. They want to talk to you more.”

“If you're selling real estate, if you're selling anything, your job is to figure out, ‘How do we get them to want us, to be involved in this world?’ And I think a lot of it comes down to relationships.”

“There are certain things I buy in my world because of the person that’s selling the product almost more than the product itself.”

“People will pay money for two things: Something that brings them joy, like a Ford Raptor or a Tesla, or something that solves a problem. Now the unique position of being a realtor is that you can do both.”

“This is just this massive referral source you create as they're going around and telling the world that you're unlike any other service they've ever used.”

“None of these people necessarily need you. And I think that that's a great mindset to kind of get into, is ‘How can I create a relationship where they want to have me in it when real estate is happening? They literally want me to be in their friends’ real estate world when they need help with real estate. It's a want thing. They need to want you to be involved with it. There is no need.”



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